The Lesson
By Emilio Santoro
It was a Saturday, and like most Saturdays Alfredo received a short but welcome visit from his two grand-kids. Their father, Alfredo’s son Maximo, dropped them off around twelve for lunch. Alfredo made sure the kids left their dirty shoes out on the front porch, and then he cooked for them and gave them chocolates and they talked about school and when they asked him questions about how he got his white hair or why he had spots on his hands he entertained them with answers.
On this particular Saturday, Fiona (a plump cheeked six year old that liked to wear pigtails) and her twin brother, Felix (a scrawny boy with a brown mop of hair) gave Grandpa Fredo an earful from the moment they stepped in his house with their little bare feet.
“Grandpa Fred school was crazy this week.” said Fiona.
“Yeah Grandpa, Brian went into the storage closet because he heard that’s where all the birthday cakes were kept and he got in and it was dark and he tripped and cut himself pretty bad on the knee.” Said Felix.
“I bet Brian likes cakes” said Alfredo.
“Yeah!” the kids said and laughed together at poor fat Brian.
“Well who told Brian there was cake there?” Alfredo said.
“ I think it was Joey, he is funny” said Fiona.
“When Mrs.Gandolfo asked him why he was bleeding Brian said he thought there was cake and everyone laughed at him because he turned red like a tomato” said Felix
“Like a FAT tomato” said Fiona and the kids laughed hard.
“I hope you kids don’t get in trouble for being silly like that Brian you’re telling me about” said Alfredo, now rocking on his rocking chair.
“No way!” said Felix.
“We’re smart” said Fiona.
Alfredo smiled and thought to himself that his grand-kids were smart. He thought himself a lucky grand-father.
“Let me go to the bathroom really quick, you kids be good”
“Ok” said the kids.
Alfredo returned to the living room and saw his grand-children were not there. He went to his room and found them jumping on his king sized bed.
“Let’s go back to the living room, I want to tell y’all something” Alfredo said.
After a dozen or so more jumps the kids followed.
“While I was in the bathroom I thought a bit about poor Brian, and you know there’s a lesson to be learned here I said to myself”
Fiona and Felix were now spinning fast, their arms stretched out. A few seconds later they stopped. They saw their world shift violently and their sense of balance was impaired in a manner that would be familiar in a not so distant future, say in about fifteen years or so from then. They were having a good time.
“What are you talking about Granpa?” said Fiona, still dizzy and trying to sit down on the couch.
“I’m talking about not too long ago I was like little Fat Brian, except I wasn’t fat. I also believed some tall tale and ended up getting hurt pretty bad. Way worse than Brian.” Alfredo said, somber and grave.
Fiona and Felix were feeling better and less dizzy and asked their Grand-father to tell them what happened to him. Their little eyes were zooming on their grand-father’s forehead lines, observing how tense they were. Alfredo was making an effort to remember.
They hadn’t seen their grandfather so serious in a long time. Then his face relaxed.
“Hey kids I’m in the mood for some chocolate, would you like some Hershey bars?”
“Yeah!” they screamed in unison. Chocolate was more gratifying than a silly story. Alfredo ate a chocolate himself, and they were having a good time making fun of how their teeth look silly with chocolate painted all over.
“You might not know it, but back in the day I was one of the best tree climbers of my neighborhood. “ Alfredo said, trying to return to his story after the chocolate break. A wet, black spot stood on his left front tooth.
Fiona and Felix’s mouth opened and emitted a long O.
“How old were you Granpa?” Felix asked.
“About six or seven years old”
And he kept going, remembering as he produced the story.
“Being a good tree climber had its perks though, soon enough there were kids trying to outclimb me. The competition was fierce.”
The children’s eyes were glazed on their grand-fathers. In their little heads they were climbing trees right next to their old Granpa.
“Of course, some of the kids that tried to be better than me weren’t necessarily the nicest kids either. Those kids that try to bring you down when you’re doing good at football or basketball or climbing trees, you know?”
Fiona thought of Lila, the girl that made fun of her drawings and of her pigtails. Felix thought of Vince, the kid that every once in a while liked to chuck things at him, like basketballs on the face or stomach.
Alfredo kept telling his story.
“When I was young, and I don’t think it was just because I was young but because that’s how I’ve always been, I’m naïve and gullible.”
“What’s gullible?” Felix interrupted.
“That’s when you believe everything people tell you, no matter how ridiculous it may sound.”
More O’s from the kids.
“Anyways, I was very gullible and even now I’m kinda like that and let me tell you it’s not a good thing when people want to take advantage of that and trick you, you know?”
The kids nodded their heads. They were understanding. They were smart kids.
“So when I used to climb trees an older kid, I think his name was Ryan, told me that if I climbed a palm tree, grabbed three coconuts from the top, and climbed down with them, once I drank the coconut water I would become the strongest man in the world”
“Wow that sounds cool granpa” said Felix.
“Felix shut up, what happened granpa?” said Fiona.
“Well so the day came and Ryan had been talking and saying that if I really was the best tree climber I should climb the huge palm tree at the local YMCA. When he tried to challenge me like that of course I wanted to do it more than ever to show him that he was wrong. I think it was a Monday, it was after school was over. Ryan and all his stupid friends came over, and lots of girls came too. I was a little nervous, I had never climbed a palm tree, especially one this tall. The palm tree must have been about 25 to 30 feet tall. I really wanted to show everybody what I could do.”
Alfredo was rocking on his rocking chair a little faster. He rocked and he rocked.
“So I started climbing. My past experience proved invaluable. I wrapped my legs and arms around the trunk and climbed my way up slowly at first but I got to the top relatively easy. Then I grabbed three coconuts and started my way down. I was doing alright kids, I really was. The crowd was going crazy, some of my friends were cheering at me, yelling ‘Fre-do! Fre-do! I thought Ryan must have been pretty pissed off right then”
The kids gasped.
“Im sorry kids, don’t use that word ok? And don’t tell your parents I said it”
“Ok granpa” the kids said.
“All of a sudden I heard a beautiful voice, or at least the most beautiful voice I had heard at that age, way before I met your granma, that’s for sure. I looked down and it was Claudia, looking cute as a button. She gave me a thumbs up and smiled at me. I was climbing down allright, but I was taking my time because what I used a bag to put the coconuts in and that made my grip a little weaker on the left hand. I wanted to wave or at the least give her a thumbs up. Sometimes in those kinds of situations the brain is going through so much stress that the wrong choice is made. Instead of attempting some kind of salutation to Claudia with the hand that held the bag, I tried to giver her a thumbs up with my free hand. Well guess what happened? I lost my balance and fell really hard. I got taken to the hospital, fractured my shoulder, and made a fool of myself in front of Ryan and Claudia and all the kids cheering for me. All because I believed Ryan’s stupid story, that of course wasn’t true. At least I hope it wasn’t true. I haven’t broken a bone since.”
The kid’s were wowing and looking at each other in disbelief.
“So what’s the lesson?” said Fiona in a tone of complain.
“What do you mean what is the lesson?” said Alfredo.
“I know!” said Felix.
“Shut up stupid!” said Fiona.
“The lesson is not to believe people’s tall tales so that stupid things won’t happen to us.” Said Felix beaming.
“Ahhh, I guess I do have smart grand-kids.” Said Alfredo.
“More like a smart grand-son.” Said Felix.
“Shut up shutupshutup!” said Fiona.
“But wait granpa.” Said Felix.
“What is it Felix?” said Alfredo.
“Your story is pretty crazy granpa” said Felix.
Alfredo frowned, trying to hide how proud he was of his grand-son.
“Do you think your own grand-father, the father of your father, would lie to you Felix?”
“Uh, no. I guess not granpa.” Felix said, noticeably starting to feel sorry about what he said.
“ Do you want proof that my story is true Felix? You too Fiona?” said Alfredo.
After a slight silence, the kids nodded their heads.
Alfredo didn’t say anything else. He unbuttoned his shirt, took the right arm out of its sleeve, and showed them the scar. A thick, pink, undulating worm.
Fiona and Felix didn’t say anything. They just ran out of the living room and sat on the porch stairs.
Fiona whispered to her brother.
“Did you see that, did you see?”
Felix looked at her with scared eyes and said yes.
Alfredo went to the porch to check on them.
“Are you allright kids?”
Fiona and Felix said they were fine. Then Fiona asked.
“Can we see it again?”
Alfredo showed her. A thick, pink, worm.
The kids looked at it in utter fear.
“I’m going to the bathroom, being old has its perks.” Said Alfredo, and headed to a door with a little sign his late wife had bought that said “Pipi Room”.
Once in the bathroom, Alfredo took off his shirt and peeled off the pink silicon rubber sticking to his skin and flushed it down the toilet.
